Clarifying What Matters To You

Lately, I've been presenting workshops on creating your Visual Empowerment Map. Part of that process includes clarifying your goals. For example, one of my attendees wants to have more leisure time and build a new business. Clarification of the goals came from the realization that leisure time would follow as the business became successful and she could afford to take more vacations, etc. She really only had to work on one thing, not two.

Recently I was invited to a demonstration and offer to join a multi level marketing team (MLM). While the company had a product to sell, the sales pitch was all about just signing up more people to that business in order to earn more money. Interesting, sure. Good earning potential, yup, that was there too. However, I sensed that the woman presenting was having difficulty understanding why I didn't want in on this opportunity.

Lots of people want to earn extra money and I'm guilty of that too! But for me, coaching is where I am most authentic. Leading my workshops and partnering with clients so that they live every day empowered to be who and what they most desire. No product, no MLM can do that for me. It was actually kind of difficult to get this point across but it was important.

Clarifying who you are and what you want most, then going out and getting it, is part of how we become satisfied in our lives. Taking on a business opportunity like the one I was offered is great for a lot of people. But it was not for me. My goal is to build a network of friends, clients, workshop attendees and business associates who are living authentically (whatever that means for them). That's the goal I have clarified for myself.

Deciding what is the best way for you to express your authenticity and reaching your goals (personal and financial) is a journey. It's one you can take on your own, with friends or even with a coach. But it's yours. So whatever you take on, be authentic in your choice. If someone else doesn't understand it then that means they are on a journey different from yours, even if your destinations are the same.

"Do what you love, the money will follow." -Marsha Sinetar

Visual Empowerment Map

So, the workshop this past Sunday was great. It was small but everyone got something out of it. I'm very happy that it was a success. I'll be booking more workshops on creating your visual empowerment map. I've also learned a thing or two about this particular process since this was my first official workshop on the subject. First, you don't have to actually bring all the supplies. As a matter of fact, nobody used a single one. But what was learned during the discussion of the process and each person's experience contributing to it was priceless.

All of the participants shared their goals and their story and learned from eachother as well. That is a beautiful thing to achieve because we all can learn from one another no matter how different we may think we are.

Please contact me for more information on this process. I truly believe in it and your ability to use it to become successful in whatever you choose.

Bold Steps Toward Making Change Happen

"Freedom lies in being bold. "
Robert Frost

What does it mean to take a bold step? Sometimes in certain situations baby steps are required. For example, when you begin a new exercise regimen you can't go full blast or you could get injured. But taking that first step toward any change IS BOLD!

In any new endeavor the boldest step you can take is the first step. It's why the procrastinator will start their diet tomorrow. They don't take bold steps toward anything. Once you take the first step you are committed. The outcome may be unknown, you may succeed, you may fail you just don't know. But if you are envisioning change and success that first bold step must be taken.

Worrying about the worst possible outcome does nothing to move you toward your intended goal. Telling yourself that considering the negative outcome is preparing for it "just in case" is important. As the saying goes say "hope for the best, prepare for the worst." Great, that's why they make insurance.

But to be successful you must envision your success; to see your life as it will be when success is accomplished and to know what life will look like for you when your dream comes true. The only way for that to happen is to keep your focus on that outcome. Believe in your vision, whatever it may be, and take that first BOLD step and you'll be on your way to fearlessley making your vision a reality!

Visual Empowerment Plan

So I am starting a new project and I'm pretty excited about it. I am excited for a few reasons. First, because it's really something brand new that I have not done before. Also because it's fun and I get to have workshops and seminars on this topic. It's life coaching meets arts and crafts! If you have ever heard of or seen a vision board you'll understand that a Visual Empowerment Plan is something like that but goes a little further. Vision boards are great and they keep us focused on our goals and on winning our games, whatever they may be. Vision boards help to activate certain thinking patterns which is also known as Law of Attraction.

I have found, however, that many people confuse Law of Attraction with just thinking positive and good thoughts. That's really only part of it. Law of Attraction is so much more. I have heard some naysayers go on about how it sets us up for disappointment because bad things really do happen sometimes. But Law of Attraction isn't what they say it is. If you look back at my first blog about reframing words and ideas to be positive you'll see a very simple method of how it works. It's not about ignoring or pretending something isn't happening or hoping it will go away if you don't pay attention to it. It's about changing your perspective. In other words, opening up for the positive. When you remove the words or ideas that elicit negative emotions and replace them with positive one's you attract not just positive events but also a more optimistic outlook. It's not about lying to yourself but it is about making sure that you are paying attention to what's good out there. You "attract" positive people and circumstances not because you've magically made them appear but because you are now attentive to their existence. Plus, of course we know that happy begets happy. Smiles are contagious and so is confidence and optimism.

What better way to make that happen than by creating your own Visual Empowerment Plan. This is not just a vision board. It's not about cutting out pictures and words that remind you of your goal and motivate you to reach it. This is more. A Visual Empowerment Plan is your map that begins today and takes you through to your goal. It doesn't have a timeframe unless you want it to. It does contain some vision board elements, like a board and pictures. But there is more power in it than that. On your Visual Empowerment Plan you include not just representations of what you want but representations of what you have, what you need, and what you'll do.

If you want to achieve better health a picture of healthy food or smaller bathing suit isn't enough. You will look at your Visual Empowerment Plan and be inspired to utilize all the tools you have. To go certain places, engage with certain people, have specific experiences, etc. So here is an outline and I am deliberately keeping it somewhat vague because this is YOUR Visual Empowerment Plan and it's your creation.

Of course you need a board or something. If you are really creative and have a home office, dedicate an entire wall to this - go wild! Here is the part that is similar to a vision board. Pictures, photos, cut outs, prints from the internet - whatever - of things that represent your goal (health, finance, relationships...). Ok that's it for similarities.

Here's what else you should include. Representations of skills, knowledge, inspirations, people, places that are already part of your life that will help you reach your goal (family, friends, partner, meditation center...). Something that represents your progress. When you look at your Visual Empowerment Plan you are not only motivated to reach your goal but learn to appreciate who you are, what you have that inspires you, and acknowledge your achievements or how far you've come. How you choose to have these things represented is up to you. You can use photos, you can draw, paint, use crayons anything that expresses who you are.

There is only one hard and fast rule with any of these plans. Nothing negative! No red circle with a line through it, none of that. Only images of your strenghts, the people and places that elevate you and build those strengths or teach you new one's, and the goal. Your plan can be huge (a wall) or poster sized and it can include as many or as few images as you like. But it must elicit those positive emotions that inspire and motivate you to achieve whatever it is you plan.

Oh, one last thing. There is no time frame to create your Visual Empowerment Plan. Take an hour, a weekend, a week, whatever, but complete it. And feel free to change it or make a new one with every new goal.

Now have some fun and let me know how it goes!

Holidays Are Coming; How Are You Preparing For The Stress?

From 2004 to the present, finances have been the #1 cause of stress. As the holidays approach our stressors are exacerbated by demands to buy gifts, entertain, etc. Credit card debt, the poor economy and family responsibilities seem to conspire to increase our stress level. Many people cope with stress by making unhealthy food choices, among other behaviors . Poor coping behaviors don’t actually reduce our stress. In fact, they can add to it.

This holiday season is an especially difficult one for many of us. Business has slowed down, some people are out of work and yet the demands remain. You might be asking yourself how you can get your holiday shopping done without breaking the bank, without disappointing your children or other family members. Demands to conform or to buy the latest hot item for your kids may be undermining your ability to effectively deal with stress. Parental guilt caused by not buying that item is short term. Setting realistic financial goals for your holiday spending is the first and most important step and will have long term effects including teaching coping strategies to your children.

Here are a few of the most common tips to reduce holiday stress:

Identify the stress, evaluate your responses to that stress, make changes where necessary incrementally, first one behavior, then the next. Only by recognizing and tackling these issues one at a time can you make real and lasting changes. When you feel that you must change it all overnight you increase your stress and anxiety.

As I said before; set realistic goals for what you want to achieve this holiday season. Being realistic, not being drawn in by marketing or media messages, about what you need or must have will help you stay on track. If finances are an issues create a budget and stick to it.

Keep it in perspective. Check your stressors over the long term, where to do they fit in, how impactful are they really? If the stress you are feeling is restricted to this holiday season then you can let it go more easily. The impact is minimal and studies show that even under stressful conditions most people feel good about their holidays with family. Knowing that you will too can help alleviate some of the stress and anxiety of entertaining.

Remember what’s really important this holiday season (hint: it’s not in the amount of money you spend).

In these difficult times our family and friends and the support we give one another is priceless and that’s what makes holidays memorable!