New Workshops Scheduled

I have two new workshops scheduled and I'm very excited about them. Both are taking place at the Center for Relaxation & Healing at Plainsboro. But you don't have be involved with the center to attend these workshops. These two workshops are all about becoming empowered in the everyday.

Workshop 1: Creating Positive Relationships with Food - February 22, 2010 from 7:00pm to 8:30 pm. This workshop is about you finding your inner strengths and the truly unlimited options that you possess to cope with stressful and emotional events in your life.

Workshop 2: Creating Your Visual Empowerment Map. My previous post referred to this as a Visual Empowerment Plan. I have decided to go with "map" because it's more intuitive. March 7, 2010, from 11:00am to 1:00pm. This is a 2 hour workshop, hands on, where you get to start creating your VEM.

RSVP and registration is required for both workshops. Please go to my website to the Calendar tab for more details. See you there!

Visual Empowerment Plan

So I am starting a new project and I'm pretty excited about it. I am excited for a few reasons. First, because it's really something brand new that I have not done before. Also because it's fun and I get to have workshops and seminars on this topic. It's life coaching meets arts and crafts! If you have ever heard of or seen a vision board you'll understand that a Visual Empowerment Plan is something like that but goes a little further. Vision boards are great and they keep us focused on our goals and on winning our games, whatever they may be. Vision boards help to activate certain thinking patterns which is also known as Law of Attraction.

I have found, however, that many people confuse Law of Attraction with just thinking positive and good thoughts. That's really only part of it. Law of Attraction is so much more. I have heard some naysayers go on about how it sets us up for disappointment because bad things really do happen sometimes. But Law of Attraction isn't what they say it is. If you look back at my first blog about reframing words and ideas to be positive you'll see a very simple method of how it works. It's not about ignoring or pretending something isn't happening or hoping it will go away if you don't pay attention to it. It's about changing your perspective. In other words, opening up for the positive. When you remove the words or ideas that elicit negative emotions and replace them with positive one's you attract not just positive events but also a more optimistic outlook. It's not about lying to yourself but it is about making sure that you are paying attention to what's good out there. You "attract" positive people and circumstances not because you've magically made them appear but because you are now attentive to their existence. Plus, of course we know that happy begets happy. Smiles are contagious and so is confidence and optimism.

What better way to make that happen than by creating your own Visual Empowerment Plan. This is not just a vision board. It's not about cutting out pictures and words that remind you of your goal and motivate you to reach it. This is more. A Visual Empowerment Plan is your map that begins today and takes you through to your goal. It doesn't have a timeframe unless you want it to. It does contain some vision board elements, like a board and pictures. But there is more power in it than that. On your Visual Empowerment Plan you include not just representations of what you want but representations of what you have, what you need, and what you'll do.

If you want to achieve better health a picture of healthy food or smaller bathing suit isn't enough. You will look at your Visual Empowerment Plan and be inspired to utilize all the tools you have. To go certain places, engage with certain people, have specific experiences, etc. So here is an outline and I am deliberately keeping it somewhat vague because this is YOUR Visual Empowerment Plan and it's your creation.

Of course you need a board or something. If you are really creative and have a home office, dedicate an entire wall to this - go wild! Here is the part that is similar to a vision board. Pictures, photos, cut outs, prints from the internet - whatever - of things that represent your goal (health, finance, relationships...). Ok that's it for similarities.

Here's what else you should include. Representations of skills, knowledge, inspirations, people, places that are already part of your life that will help you reach your goal (family, friends, partner, meditation center...). Something that represents your progress. When you look at your Visual Empowerment Plan you are not only motivated to reach your goal but learn to appreciate who you are, what you have that inspires you, and acknowledge your achievements or how far you've come. How you choose to have these things represented is up to you. You can use photos, you can draw, paint, use crayons anything that expresses who you are.

There is only one hard and fast rule with any of these plans. Nothing negative! No red circle with a line through it, none of that. Only images of your strenghts, the people and places that elevate you and build those strengths or teach you new one's, and the goal. Your plan can be huge (a wall) or poster sized and it can include as many or as few images as you like. But it must elicit those positive emotions that inspire and motivate you to achieve whatever it is you plan.

Oh, one last thing. There is no time frame to create your Visual Empowerment Plan. Take an hour, a weekend, a week, whatever, but complete it. And feel free to change it or make a new one with every new goal.

Now have some fun and let me know how it goes!

Holidays Are Coming; How Are You Preparing For The Stress?

From 2004 to the present, finances have been the #1 cause of stress. As the holidays approach our stressors are exacerbated by demands to buy gifts, entertain, etc. Credit card debt, the poor economy and family responsibilities seem to conspire to increase our stress level. Many people cope with stress by making unhealthy food choices, among other behaviors . Poor coping behaviors don’t actually reduce our stress. In fact, they can add to it.

This holiday season is an especially difficult one for many of us. Business has slowed down, some people are out of work and yet the demands remain. You might be asking yourself how you can get your holiday shopping done without breaking the bank, without disappointing your children or other family members. Demands to conform or to buy the latest hot item for your kids may be undermining your ability to effectively deal with stress. Parental guilt caused by not buying that item is short term. Setting realistic financial goals for your holiday spending is the first and most important step and will have long term effects including teaching coping strategies to your children.

Here are a few of the most common tips to reduce holiday stress:

Identify the stress, evaluate your responses to that stress, make changes where necessary incrementally, first one behavior, then the next. Only by recognizing and tackling these issues one at a time can you make real and lasting changes. When you feel that you must change it all overnight you increase your stress and anxiety.

As I said before; set realistic goals for what you want to achieve this holiday season. Being realistic, not being drawn in by marketing or media messages, about what you need or must have will help you stay on track. If finances are an issues create a budget and stick to it.

Keep it in perspective. Check your stressors over the long term, where to do they fit in, how impactful are they really? If the stress you are feeling is restricted to this holiday season then you can let it go more easily. The impact is minimal and studies show that even under stressful conditions most people feel good about their holidays with family. Knowing that you will too can help alleviate some of the stress and anxiety of entertaining.

Remember what’s really important this holiday season (hint: it’s not in the amount of money you spend).

In these difficult times our family and friends and the support we give one another is priceless and that’s what makes holidays memorable!

Wellness Workshop

My next workshop is coming up soon, again at the Sayreville Public library. This workshop is free as well, just like the last one. The focus of this workshop will be on using food as a coping mechanism. However, that's just a portion. The workshop is going to be devoted to total wellness, including what types of stress trigger some very unhealthy responses and how to change them.

The workshop is September 26, from 1p to 3p. I hope you can join me.